Blame it on Humph…

Tub and Lerky had set out on their big adventure.  Yes, yes.  Off they were….. to find the  Ends of the Earth.   Their knapsack filled with ginger ale, nutter-butter peanut butter cookies, and sardines.   But back to the beginning.   It had all started when they overheard Humphrey Bogart whistle through his teethy snare… “I will follow you to the ends of the earth Rose.”  Maybe it was his hat.   Or it could have been the trench coat.  But neither Tub nor Lerky could ignore the challenge that this particular statement had proposed. They both knew they really had to quit staying up late and watching The Movie Channel.  But the duo had taken his words to heart… and now…. and NOW…. THIS.

To the ends of the earth.  It has sounded like such a good idea.  Even the curbside Prophet had hollered something at them on Tuesday, as they ate their hamburgers and donuts outside Spiggly’s Cafe.  Tub liked extra pickles.  A lot.  But that is neither here nor there.  Yes, that Soap-Box Oracle had yammered something about the “ends of the earth”, or the ends of the world… something along those lines, they thought.  And then……..Bogie.

But now they faced peril.   Too, too, far away from home, and Tub had eaten the breadcrumb trail as they went.  This was big trouble indeed.  Pumpernickel would have been much  better, but Lerky brought whole grain crumbs instead.  The whole grains were working on little Tub… and now he HAD to go.  Curses, how he had to go.  And we are not talking number one.

And… and….. and…. wouldn’t you know it!  There’s never a john around when you need one.  Except for my cousin John.  He is the kind of guy you can always count on to be around when you need him….  But back to the story….  there they were.   In search of a different kind of john….  And to make things worse…. Lerky was starting to miss Scarlett, their pet bulldog.

On their way to the ends of the earth. They only hoped there’d be a White Castle there.  The kind with sliders.  And extra pickles.  Yes, a big White Castle…..

But first, they had to figure a way to get out of this pickle.  (….to be continued……..  )

712 thoughts on “Blame it on Humph…

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